hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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