Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
