shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
