Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize