I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
Mitt romney looks like a fantastic lover (full disclorsure: im 76% vodka right now)
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
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