The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Randomize
