Sarah Palin just quit. Happy Independence day!
God Bless America!
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
Randomize
