Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
