I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
