Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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