you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
Randomize
