Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
