I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
