she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
