Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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