turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
not ubering you a puppy
Randomize
