nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I would literally rather jam a rusty rail road spike into my cock than be here right now. The whore showed up and now I might smash my iPhone into my face repeatedly until I'm no longer consisting of any sort of life.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
