McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
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