my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
