Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
