Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
IF THE GUY WHO I AM BORROWING OUR CAR FROM FINDS ONE CONDOM OR JIZZ STAIN IN THIS CAR HE IS GOING TO CASTRATE MY ASS. SERIOUSLY, DON'T FUCK IN THE CAR.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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