Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
is there a reason blood came out of my hair in the shower?
head injury at diner. you headbutted the wall a few times because it got in your way
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
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