hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
We need to feng shui this bitch.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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