Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
well i just got discharged from the hospital after getting pegged in the head by a t-shirt gun so thats how my night was.
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Damn victory sex feels great
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
