your room smells of hookers.
And success
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Randomize