I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
even my farts smell like vagina
pop tarts are not kleenex
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
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