Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
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