This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
