FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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