i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I went to a community college and majored in Bad Decisions. I'm not exactly a chick magnet.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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