dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Randomize
