It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Yeah i was handcuffed to the bed all night but i actually slept like a baby
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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