imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
this is really not the time to pretend we have morals
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Randomize
