I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
