Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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