You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize