Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
i think you know its gunna be a bad day when it starts with throwing up into a red plastic cup
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Randomize
