yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize