Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
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