god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
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