Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Randomize
