I would go down on you faster than GM stock
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
