the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Randomize
