Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
I can feel your judgement through the phone
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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