There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
If the blood belongs to whoever dumped glitter all over my couch than the motherfucker got what was coming to them. If not, I hope they're ok.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
