And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize