Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
