i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
a guy in a toll booth on I-90 told me to fuck off for not being a red sox fan. i am going to miss massachusetts very much.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
So "I hate myself Mondays" has extended to Tuesday this week. I just had peanut butter and a glass of wine for lunch.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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