maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
We're in ER. He's high on morphine and I'm drunk. Gonna score some bed pans for jello shots.
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
