Well apparently he's into motor boating.
What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
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